Do you ever just feel like a bad person?

Yes, I’m going through it rihhtnnow

Hi! I have the same time of OCD which often makes me believe that i’m a horrible person who has no control of her actions. My brain tells me that I am going to emotionally hurt everyone I love and it won’t be intentional, it’ll happen and I won’t be able to change it. It’s important to remind yourself in moments like these that the fact that your brain allows these intrusive thoughts is because it is a reflection of the opposite. The brain knows exactly what is important to you and what thought would bother you. People with moral OCD are often the most empathetic, compassionate, and self aware people there are. And always remember… bad people are not concerned about being a bad person. Only good people are!

hi! i’m dealing with the EXACT same thing right now and it’s really hard! like it sucks so so bad. at one point my hair fell out and i cried every day for 2 weeks straight over this exact thing. almost half of my year has been taken away from me. i’ve had feelings, commands, urges, visions, the whole nine yards. i’m still working through this, but unfortunately, the ONLY way to deal with this and to heal is to work through it as it’s happening and not avoid it. this is really hard! but you have to live your life in spite of everything that your brain is telling you. you have to genuinely trust that you have the best intentions for yourself and others, despite the overwhelming feelings and thoughts of otherwise. remember that everything you’ve described are SYMPTOMS of ocd. almost everytime, with harm ocd we EXTREMELY overestimate our responsibility and ability to carry out these acts. slight reassurance, but it makes so much sense in our heads but in reality, it just wouldn’t happen the way we think it would even IF the act were to occur. ask yourself how nothing has happened by now even though you’ve been struggling with this for so long. why is that? what evidence do we have that you are able to persevere through this difficulty despite what your body is telling you? my best advice would be to just live the life you want to live in spite of everything in your head. this is REALLY hard to do but the more you do it the better your ocd will be managed as you will be exposing yourself to your fears instead of avoiding them. you are MUCH more capable that you think. if you aren’t in therapy, try to get into it if you can! ERP is really fucking awful but really helpful for this! i’ve had to hold a knife to my throat with my therapist and just sit with the uncertainty of what might happen. medication is also really helpful, so look into it if you are able to with a psychiatrist. it won’t always be this way. either your theme will change or you will get better. nothing lasts forever. at least that’s what i’ve been telling myself anyways. best of luck! you are so strong and caring, even if it doesn’t feel like it, and you’ve got this!